sometimes its good to be emotional once in awhile and so i am blogging here again, it helps retain your humane side sometimes and ... is something to do when there is nothing else to haha.
been closed to 5 mths since my last entry. in that time, BMT has passed successfully (with many good memories and frens) and now, my 3mths in OETI is almost up. i had much apphrensions upon coming here initially, but i have learnt to accept my posting and fortunately grown to like the place, its people and my coursemates. its been truly a wonderful 3 mths and by a cruel twist of fate, it has to end tommorrow. sigh. most of us will continue together to the next camp thankfully, but its just been the meeting and parting of people throughout this 5 mths of NS life that has got me thinking. Its just life isnt it sometimes, from strangers you become good frens and then by some occurances you have to part and you wouldnt know if you would ever see your good buddies again. Sometimes...it does get hard to accept, but in NS, you come to accept that meeting and parting will be a part of the experience, that no matter how close people are, we eventually have to part.
from the start with my 2 ulysess buddies, to see them depart for..the other wing, then this cool chinese dude xu lu, who eventually OOCed too, slowly everyone you warm up to starts to leave and a class size of 54 initally was whitled down to just 22 at the end. however, just as life can shoot you in the foot sometimes, it can bring you great joy too..from the final splitting of classes, my current one is tremendously fun! haha its so fun to be emo, your feelings just rise up and down. its just so nice to have a bunch of 12 guys cohesive together, okay maybe not all 12 but most of us bond together really well, especially during the last weeks where there is nothing much to do, we can simply just sit together during breaks, talking cock, helping and making fun of one another (against a common neighbourhood bootlicker :P) and playing Warcraft standard every night together haha. i really hope that we continue together as a class to Gedong where we stay out for the rest of the 2 years.
and of course, other emotions do come in sometimes, and they really make you look back and think..maybe i should have taken the initiative, maybe i shouldnt have hidden my emotions back then and be regretting them much later (and being emo now). guess it applies to everything, you learn to learn from your mistakes. no point regretting now isnt it haha, but you can truly see how good the person is looking back now. wasted =\
P.S and this kind of stuff only surface when 11 guys are sitting around talking about everything under the sun when there is absolutely NOTHING to do but they wont let us go OFF. Argh freaking dumb sometimes..
the whole world turns black and white @
8:13 PM
8:13 PM
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Ulysses S. Grant[2] (born Hiram Ulysses Grant, April 27, 1822 – July 23, 1885) was an American general and the 18th President of the United States (1869–1877). He achieved international fame as the leading Union general in the American Civil War, capturing Vicksburg in 1863 and Richmond in 1865. He accepted the surrender of his great Confederate opponent Robert E. Lee at Appomattox Courthouse.
Source: Wikipedia.com
How amazing that the day he was born, was the day i would book into BMT...185 years later lol.
Just got back from NUS law interview..have to book in at 5pm, so i have some time on my hands. as you might have guessed, i was enlisted into the Ulysess company. Its damn fun haha, the sergeants are nice and funny, the people are nice (although there are some who are abit weird tbh lol) Esp my platoon lol. Everyone knows me as the "lawyer" now >_< My platoon has 2 malays, 1 indian and 9 chinese. We had our first platoon "meeting" in our bunks on first night. Damn funny, talk about all kinds of stuff. My buddy is a malay guy from Yishun ITE. At first i was quite apprehensive, there was absolutely nobody i know in my section, platoon and company. But i definitely feel much better now hehe. The people all very friendly and whacky. Help each other wake up, set timing, talk cock. Even those from other section also talk to me. Its honestly quite overwhelming haha. Definitely nothing i expected on the first day when i didnt know anyone at all. I hope its the sign of a good two weeks and later 5 weeks to come :)
Training is going to get tough. I today already missed 1 drill and 1 PT session because of this lol. Previous day i also missed lectures. After today, its another 10 days before i can get out again T_T So far, i think it has been okay, good even, apart from my wet bed from the storm on the 1st day. And if that can be on the list of "bad things", i cant really complain much can i..just "do what sergeant say", "dont get into trouble", "be a good person", "dont do stupid things!", and just pass these 10 days.
the whole world turns black and white @
11:49 AM
11:49 AM
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
wow, its been such a lonng time since i last blogged. Dont know why just felt like writing again lol.
NS beckons in two days. Feeling..erm, abit nervous lol. I am not sure what to expect. Heard many stories from family, uncles esp (each one trying to outdo the other with their stories haha and i have got 5 so thats quite alot of to hear..and outdo) and friends of cuz..both good and bad. Personally, i think its quite fun haha, jusst for the grenade throwing. That alone is damn cool. Looking forward to that, dreading the PT definitely. Hopefully i get nice people in my bunk =)
Today also marked the end of my 4-month "project" (read: WoW) . Yea i said i would find work at macdonalds somewhere back last year lol, but end up i didnt work AT ALL this few months. Bumming is fun when you have got a time sink :P
the cost of WoW: about $150 for 4 mths.
the True cost of WoW: every waking moment of your life, your social life, freaking alot of work pay (i think even if i did work at macdonalds i would be quite rich from all those months lol) your fitness and about $150 for 4 mths.
but heck it was fun :) and to date the most successful MMORPG ever! that alone makes it a must try.
NUS Law shortlisted me for interview. was quite surprised when i came back to find this envelope on my table (not surprised thou that it was already opened..and badly stuck back) and was even more surprised with the contents. Not really sure how i got in lol, few people sign up? Or they just anyhow whack as many as they can. I mean..i know nuts about Law lol and i am not sure if i am up to it. But similarly, its very prestigious and theres this "dont mind" attitude. I dont really mind it, but i am not sure if thats what i really want. But then again, when am i ever really sure what i want. Its a dilemma.
My mum..obviously takes this very seriously lol. I could almost see the shock in her when i said i found journalism interesting and might try pursuing it lol. At least she understands i have no interest whatsoever in medicine and never push me to pursue it, but i know she will want me to do something "big" that will make me "successful" like Law, Banking etc. So, she is taking this very seriously lol, keep pestering me to hurry up and reply to them about not being able to make the interview for the next 2 weeks because of BMT.
Of cuz if things work out, i will definitely try my best to get into law (heck, even double degree if possible) then Uni must study very hard liao sian. no time to play game, no time to find girlfriend LOL. So i guess, friday marks not just the start of army life, but its the start of a fixed schedule of stuff liao. the next few years of my life have basically been planned. Army, Uni, get job, marry..work my ass off to pay for everything my wife wants lol. Like perhaps..the next 10 years of your life you can see all spread out infront of you. And its starting on friday.
Hopefully lah..10 years down the road, i can be happy lol, maybe not playing games anymore, but having a nice job, having my kids i can go home and see everyday and of cuz their mother who i love to bits(and who can truly understand how i feel hehe, however hard it is to do so) and having friends that i can count on for many years to come :) Yea i think i will be satisfied with that. Would love to go to the US someday..be it education or whatever, i just think its a wonderful country. Another of those must-do things in life.
Okay, stuff left to do, pack bag, enjoy the last two days..before the next chapter unfolds. NS here i come :)
the whole world turns black and white @
9:32 PM
9:32 PM
Friday, September 01, 2006
This place is rotting but i feel i should set some things straight.
I feel so... misunderstood sometimes haiz. I dun have the intention to be dao, or mean or anything but sometimes its juz the way i react, or not react that gives ppl the wrong idea. I m by nature, shy, i dun talk much unless i am warmed up to you. I m insociable, i lack inter-personal skills like ZH put it, i m not the kind who can pull a conversation out of a hat. Sometimes u noe like wif another person, then u really really want to strike a conversation to seem friendly because you want to be friendly, but juz(argh) cant think of smth to talk about to save your life. Put mi in the center of attention and i will freak out. The little little things like saying hi to ppl and waving at them. Actually, sometimes i feel afraid to see ppl i noe, then have to like wave to them and everything. Its better now, becoming like a natural thing, but sometimes you juz dun feel like doing it then it makes you look bad when i really didnt mean it that way. I just feel that i m giving the people the wrong impression.
I envy those who make it seems so simple, you noe, like they are born to socialize. Everybody likes them and they are very nice in person too. Those super nice people is like wow. But i have come to accept i wun be like them. I m juz not that type to socialize for the sake of socializing. I m not saying thats the intention of ppl who are sociable, but its juz that i feel because i dun really take to socializing, ppl think i m dao and all those kind of crap when its not true at all.
And then u have this kind of ppl who exist to backstab you one dae by saying bad stuff behind your back and coming to you the next dae on msn wif "heya" and proceeds to ask you for help wif Bio ILP. Seriously, wtf. Honestly i have had enough, wadever and however you want to think of mi, i cant change and i wun change, cuz its..You. My conscience is clear, I have no ill intentions, if you choose to misinterpret them for wadever reasons, theres nth i can do.
Bah.
the whole world turns black and white @
5:39 PM
5:39 PM
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Yea i suck. I have been late for 3 straight days.
I dunno whether to be amused or hurt by the scribblings of someone. Amused, because he actually took the time and effort to write it down and even put down this address for good measure. I could do wif the publicity. But then something happened which make it even more intriguing.
I m not angry or anything, i juz want to noe why. What have i done?? Why cant you approach mi directly and tell mi in the face instead of resorting to such vandalism. Seems so childish and to a certain extent cowardly. Saw the handwriting.. but i dun wan to assume anything. If you be honest, straight-forward about it, i would respect your views and you as a person, even if you dun like mi. But this is just..absurb.
I dun nid all these. The Nine Dragons can rot till i get an explanation. You want mi, come and get mi. Dun insult my friends, loved ones or go through stuff like my blog. I will never forgive you.
the whole world turns black and white @
5:30 PM
5:30 PM
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Todae, we gather here in cyberspace, to mourn the loss my of tagboard. May you rest in peace.
P.s. I think too much studying has got to my head.
the whole world turns black and white @
9:52 PM
9:52 PM
Monday, August 14, 2006
Realised todae that studying wif jona is tantamount to not studying at all, or negative studying (i.e you noe less than u did before) lol. Sry pal, but studying is like cmi wif you around. And because of that i m now behind schedule =
Maybe sometimes the best thing you can do is to shut up. Some things cannot tell ppl de haiz. I learnt it the hard way, nvm. And i figured i hurt some pple sometimes when i juz lose control and blast them here, when after the anger is gone, u wonder wtf did i write all those. Or when i juz inexplicably spill some stuff when i really shouldnt have. I noe i nvr formally did anything the last time when i blasted (read: mistaken identity) and yea, i think its time to sae. I m sorry.
Things might be over but its a dam freaking torture. It used to be really, really sweet and i felt really happy but now its juz...can die liddat. Its so awkward. I dunno wad to do. All i feel now is to get out of sight asap. I feel fear. So now i go around wif good evasion skills.
But other than that, life is okae..maybe good, i can focus on the studying =) And DotA T_T
the whole world turns black and white @
7:26 PM
7:26 PM
